The secrets people keep

There was this article about a woman who's dad had Alzheimer's. Her mother doted on him his entire life, just to find out in one of his non lucid states that he had cheated on her for years. The daughter found the computer & a journal he kept for over 20 years documenting his escapades. Almost their entire marriage he had cheated.

It made me think about the secrets people keep.

There are things you keep to yourself because they are yours. Like the physical abuse I dealt with.
There are secrets that are not so secret like the fact that I don't like my sons girlfriend.

Recently I had a conversation with my cousin. We talked about the summer I was15 & worked for her selling hot dogs and she paid me cash it was the best job I have ever had in my life. After I came home  she casually mentioned to my dad that she had paid me. He lost his shit & kicked in my bedroom door grabbed me by the neck & tried to choke me. My brother rushed in & pulled him off of me. I was grounded & it was never spoken of again. The hinges on my door were bent & so was my idea of love.
 My cousin apologized, I thought it was weird like why did she apologize?  She said for the fact that I went through that. It's funny how people don't know how to react. I wasn't asking for a reaction just casually telling a story. She told me how her sister had been sexually abused by a Dr for years & how she was  sexually assaulted at 5 years old by a teenage boy at her school & her mother felt bad that the boys father beat the crap of him for doing it.

She kept that secret for 60 years, I kept mine for 32. Her mother & my father were siblings, it made me wonder what secrets they kept.

I went on to have an abusive boyfriend, being choked & slapped & mentally abused for about a year. After that I realized I don't need to take shit from people & also never trust people 100%.
When my husband & I got together my friends at work kept saying he's a good guy you need to trust him. I finally did & here we are 27 years later .

There are very few people I trust & no one besides me knows my full story. Like most people, I will take it to the grave.


The Romantics:

When you close your eyes and go to sleep
And it's down to the sound of a heartbeat
I can hear the things that you're dreaming about
When you open up your heart and the truth comes out